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    Why are elves literally the shittiest of all shitters in basically all video games? #The Witcher elves make me want to hang them in their precious fucking trees and burn the whole forest down.
    #Dragon Age elves make me want to kick them in the ribs until they puke and shit blood at the same time.
    In #Dwarf Fortress I sometimes screw up the whole fortress just so I can undermine a huge elven settlement and awaken a demon in there to kill their women and children while the men are hunting.
    In #The Elder Scrolls they are insufferable cunts. They are all racist to hell and back, and act like some superior beings, when in truth my Redguard will beat them to a pulp in the matter of seconds despite their precious magic.
    The elves that inhabit the world of #Warcraft are annoying houlier-than-thou treehugging shitmunchers who, for some reason, see that the world is theirs to fuck up. And they fuck it up plenty.

    I AM ANGRY
    ANGRY ABOUT ELVES!
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    • Not Important
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    • Gries He
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      Gries He
      Editing … Why do you feel like your parents never truly loved and accepted you?
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    • Gries He
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      Editing … It's okay to be into men.
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    • Gries He
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      Editing … There's nothing wrong wearing women's underwear and dresses some of the time.
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    • Not Important
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      Editing … But my parents loved me unconditionally. They still do. And they've always accepted every single one of my choices without a bad word. I'm also a married man with two kids and a third one on the way.
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      Editing … I agree with you on the women's underwear and dresses. I actually encourage my wife to use exclusively clothes made for women.
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    • Gries He
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      Editing … Let it all out. It's good to let off steam. Breathe in, breathe out
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      Editing … I could rant on about elves. I can also say positive things about them if you'd want me to.
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    • Gries He
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      Editing … It's not about elves, is it. It's never been about elves.
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    • Not Important
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      Editing … No, that's where you are wrong. It has always been about elves. ALWAYS. It's been about elves before you were born. But I will have my revenge. And then the elves will make long and convoluted rageposts about me.
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    • Gries He
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      Editing … Ssh, no tears, only dreams now
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    • Not Important
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      Editing … No dreams before elves are destroyed.
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    • Ryan Thorp
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      Editing … Looks like Gries is hitting the bottle early today guys.
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    • Bob GutSmasha
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      Bob GutSmasha
      Editing … Holy crap I feel exactly the same way! I murder the fucking cunts in any game that lets me. They are either up their own asses, or miserable whiny wimps. My favorite was the stupid one in Dragon Age Origins, you trick him into giving you the sword he was delivering and he gets hanged for it! BUAHAHAHAHAHAAHAHAHAAAAHHAA
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    • Bob GutSmasha
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      Editing … pointy eared fucks
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    • Bob GutSmasha
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      Editing … oh man that felt good
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    • Rich .
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      Editing … On the one hand #Legolas is awesome and #Dobby's one of my favourite HP characters. On the other hand I do hate this guy with a passion: http://www.ballooncrate.com/assets/images/Advanced%20Graphics/1720.jpg
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    • Husky Wing
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      Editing … Racist!
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      Editing … Factd aren't racist Husky :D
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    • Husky Wing
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      Editing … Sounds a lot like a certain Mr. Trump!
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    • Husky Wing
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      Editing … Let me guess, all Khajiit steal TVs, and all Nords are drunks? You disgust me.
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    • Not Important
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      Editing … Nah, some Khajits are call and there are Nords that don't drink. But a good elf is either Tolkien, slave, or a lie.
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    • Husky Wing
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      Editing … WOW. WOW. LISTEN TO THIS HUMAN PRIVILEGE.
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      Editing … Remember, the only elves that are okay are in the writings of humans. Around elves, watch yourselves.
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    • Not Important
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      Editing … Even the "helpful" ones like the master smith in The Witcher III are total insufferable cunts. And don't give me bullshit about human privilege. We're not the literally immortal light as feather bastards that fart rainbows.
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    • Husky Wing
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      Editing … After all the persecution they faced at the hands of you people, you're surprised? What do you expect, "thank you sir, sorry sir" from every elf you meet? These people are being hunted down by your kind! Just look at @Bob GutSmasha-- slaughters any elf he sees, and do the authorities bat an eye? Not only that, but he got an innocent elf hanged. Sounds an awful lot like an old american lynching.
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      Editing … We are literally at war with the bastards. Are you criticizing the poor fucking treatment of SS soldiers in 1942? Because I sure as hell am not. I stand by my friend Bob. Pointy eared fucks.
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      Editing … You can't handle the truth!
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    • Husky Wing
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      Editing … Are you encouraging a race war?!
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      Editing … They started it! We were only defending ourselves by slaughtering their women and children! THEY HAD OUR OIL!
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    • Husky Wing
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      Editing … YOU IMPERIALISTS AND YOUR MANIFEST DESTINY!
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    • Bob GutSmasha
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      Editing … We are not racist, there's just a perfectly good ocean out there to drown all elves in, it would be a shame to waste it.
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    • Husky Wing
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      Editing … WHO HID THEIR RINGS OF POWER FROM SAURON?! THE ELVES! Only the Elven-king had the foresight to know what was coming! But not those men, nooo, they just wouldn't listen! Do you know what happened to the greedy men, and their rings? Have you even SEEN a Ringwraith in person?
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    • Not Important
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      Editing … WHO MADE THE SILMARIL AND THUS FUCKED EVERYTHING UP? HUH? Oh right, it was THE ELVES! And who was the one that actually created the One ring? Excuse me? OH IT WAS AND ELF TOO?
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    • Rich .
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      Editing … This hateful kind of prejudice is so common there's a trope for it: http://tvtropes.org/pmwiki/pmwiki.php/Main/FantasticRacism
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      Editing … It's common because it's correct.
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    • Husky Wing
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      Editing … Celebrimbor was tortured! Everyone has a breaking point! But he made up for what he did-- we all know the tale of the ranger and wraith that fought against Mordor from the shadows!
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      Editing … That tale was literally made up. No elf would ever help a human being. Also, do you remember the story of Elrond and Isildur at Mount Doom? Surely you don't believe in elven propaganda that claims Elrond was the good guy? The bastard is in possession of a ring of power for crying out loud!
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      Editing … Even Eru Ilúvatar himself wanted elves gone.
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    • Rich .
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      Editing … It's a bit rich of you to make claims about propaganda @Not Important. Mankind is going to extreme lengths to justify the hate. Think of Buddy "the Elf", easily the most annoying "Elf" of all time. He's actually a human, posing as an elf to besmirch their good name. Take a look at this photo of him when he's undercover, it's obvious: http://athenacinema.com/wp-content/uploads/2014/11/elf-movie-christmas-jon-favreau-will-ferrell.jpeg
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      Editing … Elf grossed over 220 million worldwide. Over 220 million.
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    • Husky Wing
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      Editing … No elf would help a human?! Did Legolas not fight to defend Helms Deep? By some accounts (I cite a certain Peter Jackson), an entire elven army was present! Nearly all of those elves died protecting human lives!
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      Editing … It's obvious parody of the 1970's elfxploitation movies. It really shows that you are a filthy elf sympathizer when something so obvious passes you by.
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      Editing … Not many of you have read the history books of #Terry Pratchett, but those who have, probably understand the real threat that the elven kingdoms pose on us.
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    • Rich .
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      Rich .
      Editing … Yes, it did, following in a long line of highly successful propaganda films designed to enflame irrational hatred amongst the masses. The Nazi's had Triumph of the Will, the KKK had The Birth of a Nation and now you Elf haters have #Elf. You might have given fascism a new coat of paint and picked a new victim but you're not fooling me.
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      Editing … @Husky Wing, so you are taking the ramblings of an absolute madman such as the elf loving Peter Hackson into account? God (the real God, Talos, not any puny elf-god) watch over us with you and your pro-elf bullshit.
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      Editing … *I just have to mention how much I love this thread. This is something that wouldn't happen anywhere else, bar maybe 4chan. I love this site*
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    • Husky Wing
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      Editing … well, guess the love of #Mara hasn't reached everyone :grr:
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      Editing … If you continue budding with the elves, you'll find yourself in the Halls of Mandos before you know it.
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    • Husky Wing
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      Editing … Is that a threat?! Mate, you're getting into some deep shit here.
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    • Not Important
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      Editing … Oh what, you and your gang of elven hooligans and thugs coming to my doorstep? Be my quest, it's been some time since we had a nice little bonfire over here!
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    • Rich .
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      Editing … The hate has gotten so bad that some elves have started denying their heritage just to get away from it. Just look at #Link: he routinely faces down the forces of evil like it's no big deal and even he's afraid to admit his Elven heritage. Instead he tries to convince everyone he's something different called a Hylian and pulls down that green hat to cover his pointy ears.
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    • Husky Wing
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      Editing … you're this close to an all-expense-paid trip to Sovngarde, Mr. Important...
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    • Not Important
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      Editing … @Richard Pale that's prett Rich from you, claiming that the Hylian hero Link is an elf! I mean, it's no wonder he'd be ashamed if he was, but he isn't.
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      Editing … @Husky Wing come over any day.
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      Editing … Look at you two, liking each others comments. Fucking Elven Internet Defence Force.
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    • Husky Wing
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      Editing … y-you bet I'll come over! No joke! Watch me!
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    • Not Important
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      Editing … Oh yeah? Good. My hounds are hungry and I forgot to buy them more food. They like themselves some tasty elf.
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    • Rich .
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      Editing … Your hypocricy's pretty rich @Not Important there's no visible difference between a pointy eared "Hylian" like Link and an elf yet to you one's a hero and one deserves to die. If Legolas and Galadriel had introduced themselves as Hylians I bet you'd call them heroes too. You just hate a meaningless name because you need something to hate. This is just how it started in Rwanda, no real differences at all but whether your ancestors had been arbitrarily labelled Hutu or a Tutsi was life or death.
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    • Not Important
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      Editing … Now you are just full of shit. It's not like pointy ears makes an elf. Hell, not all elves even have pointy ears! Also as I already mentioned (kinda) Legolas is one of the few exceptions there is. He is a true hero, a uniter of both elves and the mankind. Galadriel, however, is a power hungry witch.
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    • Rich .
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      Editing … Let's be honest Husky, dead or not a milk drinking elf hater like this guy isn't getting into Sovngarde. When he snuffs it it'll be some plane of Oblivion for @Not Important, no doubt. Maybe the Shivering Isles, he seems mad to me.
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    • Not Important
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      Editing … Oh yeah, I understand the truth and see through the conspiracies, and I'm mad?
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    • Rich .
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      Editing … So let's get this straight in Legolas's case you can see he's undeniably a good hearted heroic type and you know his name which probably humanises him to you. And do you take from this that he might be exemplary? That there might be more good elves like him, worth getting to know or at least allowing to live in peace? No, you tell yourself he's one of very few exceptions and that it's not possible that there might be more "exceptions" you're not aware of. You essentially talk yourself out of getting cold feet about your own genocidal hate campaign in complete denial of the evidence in front of you. If that's not madness, what is it?
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    • Not Important
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      Editing … A dog once bit me. I've met hundreds of dogs, and only one has ever bitten me. I know there are dogs that bite, but unless someone specifically notes me that the dog bites, I'm assuming the dog doesn't bite.
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    • Rich .
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      Rich .
      Editing … That's right, you don't assume all dogs bite and make hateful generalisations just because you know some do. You take the view of innocent until proven guilty - classic concept, pretty central tenet of justice - and quite rightly you even apply it to animals. You gave dogs a chance and you've probably discovered that most of them are loyal, intelligent and affectionate animals. But do you give elves - not just animals but another sentient race with human level intelligence - that same chance? No, you have an insane and irrational generalised hatred of them which through our discussion of Legolas you have freely admitted is based on hateful stereotypes they don't all conform to.
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      Editing … You were able to miss my point in the most incredible way imaginable. 99.9% of elves I've met have been shitters. 00.1% of dogs I've met have been shitters. I don't expect a dog to be a shitter, and I don't expect an elf to not be a shitter.
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    • Rich .
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      Editing … 1 in 100 dogs would be 1%, not 0.1%. I'm not sure I can rely on you to provide reliable statistics on how many elves you've met and haven't liked when you're making Mathematical mistakes like that. Plus you're relying on your own anecdotal personal experience for evidence which any good social researcher will tell you can be skewed enormously by chance and by your own demographic and background. Just how many elves have you personally met anyway? How many elven communities have you visited? Did you give them all a chance before spewing hatred at them and trying to provoke a reaction you could use to justify your hatred?
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    • Husky Wing
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      Editing … I can't understand how someone would hate #Arwen Undómiel ;-;
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      Editing … Deleted by himself
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    • Not Important
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      Editing … As I stated before, a lot of Tolkien elves are good. Such as Arwen, #Lúthien Tinúviel, and #Fingolfin and such. @Richard Pale, you must be really daft. I said hundreds of dogs, not a hundred. It's ironic that you criticize my credibility when you are the one making the simple mistake. Also I have been to a great number of elven settlements. On my travels to Morrowind, a land filled to the brink with elves, as a simple Khajit I met incredible amounts of prejudice and hate towards me, even though I never did anything. As a Witcher I have helped elves to get rid off of nasty monsters, and what do I get, foolish mockery, and a threat to my very life. Also are we just going to brush through the fact that elves created the Silmarils and the One Ring, two of the worst things to happen to middle earth?
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    • Rich .
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      Editing … Don't worry @Not Important, regardless I don't seriously doubt your maths skills. It's far more likely your statistics seem dubious at best because you're making them up as you go. Your hypocrisy is damning. Go to Skyrim the homeland of the Nords and watch how Khajit caravan traders are barred from entering Whiterun, Solitude, Windhelm and Markarth even though those same cities will knowingly allow Daedra worshippers, Dark Brotherhood assassins and Thieves Guild members through their gates and then tell me only elven homelands are full of prejudice. Go to Novigrad to meet the witch hunters and see Radovid's bonfires and then try to tell me that only elves are hateful around Witchers. Look at how Numenor was corrupted and fell, how Nine out of Nine supposedly great human kings became the Nazgul, how Isildur allowed the ring to endure and how Haradrim, Easterlings and Corsairs fought for Sauron until the very end and then tell me that only elves have a history of terrible mistakes in Middle Earth. Such double standards, I'm embarrassed for you.
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    • Bob GutSmasha
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      Editing … I present to the people, the strongest case against elves https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ypXMAIL0p5w
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    • Caff
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      Caff
      Editing … I am sorry guys, but I must say this: I am an elf. I have always been an elf. In fact, I have disguised myself as a human for the past 17 years, 9 months, and 9 days, not that I've counted. I believe that it is for the betterment of the Favsland community that I reveal my true nature: as an elf. I beg of everyone to still accept me as just another companion in this list-based website adventure, and to not be prejudiced little shits. Thank you.
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    • Rich .
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      Editing … "This video is not available in your region". You're right, that's just as strong of a case against Elves as anything I've heard so far.
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    • Husky Wing
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      Editing … It's a recording of a famous colosseum fighter slaughtering an elven fan.
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    • Rich .
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      Editing … That's barbaric, don't look Riley.
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    • Bob GutSmasha
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    • Husky Wing
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      Editing … JESUS CHRIST, YOU'RE SICK! YOU'RE SICK! YOU'RE FUCKING SICK!
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    • Not Important
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      Editing … The Altmer started a war against Skyrim just to stop them from worshipping their God, so it's understandable that they are prejudiced against strangers. That doesn't make it okay, but explains that the root of the problem is in elves once again. Adoring Fan is another great example. Radovid is a literal madman. Emrys is the emperor of the biggest empire of all time, and he accepts all nonhumans, mutants and mages. The elves don't. I'll give you the Church of the Eternal Fire though, they are an example of humans regressing to the level of elvenkind. And need I remind you that The nine of the nine great kings of men were all corrupted by a magical trinket created by an elf. Again, all these problems can be traced back to elves. Have you read the books of Terry Pratchett? That in itself should prove you what elves truly are. Have you played Dungeons and Dragons a lot? Because it's a fact that elves tend to be lying, betraying cunts. And if we get to colossal fuckups, how about Warcraft, where literally every single problem can be traced back to elves misusing magic as they pleased, and tearing the world apart.
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    • Husky Wing
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      Editing … YOU WOULD HUNT DOWN AN INNOCENT AND MOUNT THEM ON YOUR WALL... BECAUSE THEY ANNOYED YOU?! YOU'RE A FUCKING PSYCHOPATH!!
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    • Bob GutSmasha
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      Editing … @Husky Wing the head was clearly severed without issue. The elf did not suffer and now continues to exist in an improved state, that state being silence. It is a perfectly civilized conclusion.
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    • Not Important
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      Editing … Oh come on Husky, the Adoring fan got what it wanted. It got to always be close to the Grand Champion.
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    • Husky Wing
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      Editing … you... you're all insane... g-get away from me! Oh god! Oh, dear god!
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    • Rich .
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      Editing … You need to brush up on your Tamrielic history @Not Important. It's no excuse for their actions but the Thalmor were radicalised by a history of oppression dating back to Tiber Septim's conquest of their homeland and prejudices such as your own. You've got some nerve trying to simplify this into an Elves vs Men situation. The Thalmor's first victims were other High Elves in the coup after the Oblivion crisis, their next victims were the neighbouring Wood Elves who they subjugated and to this day their main enemy is the multicultural Empire which treats all races equally. The Stormcloaks know this and yet as much as anyone else they focus their hatred on Dark Elf refugees, natural allies against the Thalmor displaced after the eruption of Red Mountain. The root of the problem is a vicious circle of racial hatred and vengeance that needs to be put aside. Also I suspect Daedric Lords might have pulled a few strings.
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    • Rich .
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      Editing … Moving onto Middle Earth, again your ignorance is showing: Nine of the Nine great kings of men were corrupted not by their own perfectly good elf made rings but by the influence of the One Ring forged in secret by the Dark Lord Sauron; a Maia. Now that I've clarified that for you I imagine you won't redirect your prejudices towards other Maiar like Gandalf or Radagast though. I expect you'll just move on and try to come up with a new excuse for your elf hatred like you have every time I've refuted you so far.
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    • Rich .
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      Editing … I will concede that multiversal theory would imply that in some twisted universe barely sharing any parallels with our own there are elves that genuinely deserve your hatred. Terry Pratchett's Discworld would seem to be that universe but let's recap, shall we? To find an example that justifies your prejudices you've had to go to a strange parallel world balanced on top of four elephants standing on a giant turtle's back where the Grim Reaper is a Santa Claus knock off impersonator, luggage is both sentient and carnivorous and dwarves use stale bread as weaponry. Clearly the Elves of that world are as unlike the Elves of other worlds in all but name.
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    • Not Important
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      Editing … I'm not saying that all humans do what is right, but saying that it's the empires and Tiber Septim's fault that the Altmer got radicalized is a joke. As you yourself mentioned, the Empire is a multicultural country, which treats all races equally. And the hate towards Dark Elves is, while mayhaps not justified, completely understandable. When there is a sudden influx of magic using refugees, elves that you have never seen before but that are known for their skills in necromancy, destruction magic, stealth and illusion, it clearly creates some prejudice. Now let us think real hard. What is the worst thing you've seen a Nord to do an elf in Skyrim, unprovoked? Or a Khajit, or any other race. In Morrowind, I've been stabbed just for being the member of the wrong race.
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    • Not Important
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      Editing … Your Middle-Earth point is void, and it's ridicklous that you think you know the history of Middle-Earth so well, when in fact the One Ring was created by an elf. Sure, Sauron imbued with his malice and power, but he could have never done it without the WILLING help of an elf. And saying that my Discworld point is wrong because the world is not to your liking, well that's just weak.
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    • Rich .
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      Editing … The modern empire might be multicultural and tolerant but way back in the Second Era Tiber Septim was an aggressive conqueror. I don't care if he later became a God or not, he's a historically documented warmonger with a belief in racial purity, the Altmer were a victim of that and this created huge resentment. Does that get the Thalmor off the hook for their own crimes? No, of course not but it does demonstrate the vicious circle of racial violence dating back all the way to Ysgramor and the Snow Elves. Tamriel needs to cast this cycle aside and move on and your elf hate isn't helping. I am glad we've made enough progress that you admit the hate towards Dark Elves is mayhaps not justified, that's quite an improvment on your earlier policy of let's "kill their women and children in self defence".
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    • Rich .
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      Editing … My Middle Earth point is entirely valid, the Elves may have been deceived by Sauron's disguise whilst they were making their rings of power but members of every race in Middle Earth have been deceived by Sauron at some point or another and ultimately they did not help him forge the One Ring, they forged the other rings of power and they did so with the best of intentions. "In the fires of Mount Doom the Dark Lord Sauron forged in secret a master ring to control all others and into this ring he poured his cruelty, his malice and his will to dominate all life" seems pretty unambiguous to me.
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    • Rich .
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      Editing … You've missed my point about Discworld entirely, you're right about the elves of discworld, they're bad. My point was that with an infinite number of universes a strange twisted world where elves actually are uniformly deserving of your hatred was inevitable (as is a universe where all humans are awful, a universe where the Aztecs conquered the world, a world where Donald Trump would be a good president etc that's just multiversal theory for you). I mentioned the weirdness of the giant turtle/elephant based astrogeology in order to highlight your double standard. You don't look at Discworld being balanced on giant elephants standing on an enormous turtle and use that as evidence that all worlds are similarly balanced on colossal elephants/turtles, you acknowledge that Discworld is weird. The same's true for Discworld's Elves, you can't look at their awfulness and use it to conclude the elves of other worlds are awful, it's just Discworld being different and weird.
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    • Not Important
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      Editing … *okay this argument is getting really hard since you are correct. It's pretty hard to debate on the obvious losing side to be honest :P*
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    • Rich .
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      Editing … Deleted by himself
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    • Not Important
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      Editing … As I previously mentioned, the elves featured in the works of Tolkien are far better than many other elves. Although they are snobby cunts, at least they can make some right decisions. The rings of power was a fuck up, and Celebrimbor was a traitorous coward who betrayed men and dwarves, but remained loyal to elves. Silmariks and the rings of power were bith created by elves, and first and foremost for the purpose of making elves even stronger.
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      Editing … Of course there is racial tensions in Tamriel. Since the begin of time mer have considered themselves to be better than humans. They have always seen themselves as superior beings. And a conquering Tamriel to unite it as a single Empire was a noble cause, the Altmer Dominion and their bloodthirsty ways serve only one purpose, to make the elves stronger. They try to cause infighting between the Empire and the Stormcloaks, and there is very solid evidence that Ulfric was a rogue agent of the elves.
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      Editing … So because Discworld is weird at some things, it means it's weird in everything? There is no possibility that the good elves of Middle-Earth are just a weirdness?
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    • Husky Wing
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      Editing … this thread is a fucking madhouse thanks @Mr. ZAP for bringing my attention back to it
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    • MrZAP
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      Editing … Such hatred. It's depressing and yet strangely arousing.
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    • Husky Wing
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      Editing … I must admit, I have of late come around to the idea that maybe elves are pretty bad guys after all. It may have been Dragon Age that really pushed me this way.
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    • MrZAP
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      Editing … I have a copy of Origins but I can't get it to work. D:
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    • Husky Wing
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      Editing … I ended up quitting some 30-something hours in cuz altogether, it really didn't do anything fantastically. It kept reminding me of The Witcher and Kingdoms of Amalur, actually. Its music, its mostly unfamiliar combat, the level design, and the dialogue and choices were what made me think of The Witcher, but the comparison really didn't work in DA's favor. Much of the music was very similar to The Witcher's, but seeing as the first Witcher has some of the best video game music ever, it wasn't beaten by this game. The quests within DA Origins' open areas weren't as interesting as in The Witcher (or very interesting at all), and the combat relied far too heavily on RNG. You can give that combat bit a test when you play it yourself, just replay a combat sequence three times over without doing anything different yourself, and see how incredibly different things can turn out. Sometimes, I've actually not landed a single hit in combat, even after using every single one of my abilities, and other times I'd slam the same massive group on my own without using a single ability.
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    • Husky Wing
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      Editing … The dialogue actually reminded me of both The Witcher and Kingdoms of Amalur though, because while it had the expected third-person RPG dialogue similarities to The Witcher (and didn't compare well, again), it also reminded me of Kingdoms of Amalur in just how gripping it totally wasn't. Amalur has, like, some good bits, sure. Its combat can be fun, and its world is fucking massive, and if all you want is a shitton of content (quests and loot and a huge worldspace to explore) then you've got it. It's basically a single-player MMO in terms of its packed content--actually, it was meant to be an MMO. However, its lore, while I'm sure it has been developed plenty, is just boring, and the way it's presented is boring. In The Witcher and The Elder Scrolls, players naturally get super into the lore, and hell, even in plenty of non-RPGs the lore can be incredibly gripping, like in Dead Space, Alan Wake, or Quantum Break. Dragon Age's was not, and also like Amalur, neither was its dialogue.
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