• 8 years ago
    Saved!
    fuckthismoviefuckthismoviefuckthismoviefuckthismoviefuckthismoviefuckthismoviefuckthismoviefuckthismoviefuckthismoviefuckthismoviefuckthismoviefuckthismoviefuckthismoviefuckthismoviefuckthismoviefuckthismoviefuckthismoviefuckthismoviefuckthismoviefuckthismoviefuckthismoviefuckthismoviefuckthismoviefuckthismoviefuckthismoviefuckthismoviefuckthismoviefuckthismoviefuckthismoviefuckthismoviefuckthismoviefuckthismoviefuckthismoviefuckthismoviefuckthismoviefuckthismoviefuckthismoviefuckthismovie
    .....fuck
    ........this
    ............movie

    It was not until Joe Dirt 2 did I realize just how good suicide sounds. Like damn, that sounds great right now after the pure shit I just put myself through. I'm not even going to put effort into trying to explain this shit so here are some bullet points on some of the stupid shit that occurs in this.

    - Stupid parody jokes about better movies (ex1: Makes fun of how Forrest Gump tells its story, only to then tell the story like Forrest Gump | ex2: Complete rips off the opening sequence of The Sopranos, making me wish Tony Soprano would come by and shoot Joe Dirt in the fucking head)
    - Continuing off the last point: this movie has a fucking hard on for Robert Zemeckis (three direct references to three of his movies for no reason other then to piss me the fuck off and make me wish I was watching those movies.)
    - Stupid childish humor (has roughly a 3-5min sequence dedicated to a fart joke that made me want to claw my eyes out)
    - Counting off the last point: jokes out stay their welcome (sometimes they just go one and on, making me contemplate what a shotgun shell tastes like
    - Stupid callbacks to the first movie (outside of Christopher Walken nobody fucking cares. Could of cut this shit by 20min if you didn't keep making stupid fucking callback.)
    - IT'S NOT FUNNY (none of these "jokes" fucking work. They're fucking horrible and make me question my sanity)
    - IT USES FUCKING INTERNET MEEMS AS JOKES (twice in fact. I don't know how I made it to the end of this, I really fucking don't)
    - It uses time travel as a plot device (speaks for itself really)
    - Continuing off the last point: Joe Dirt meets Lynyrd Skynyrd, leading to an obviously stupid joke (It involves what the name of their band should be, pretty sure you can guess where it goes)
    - When making those callbacks Kid Rock must of found himself above this movie. So they drag Mark McGarth into this (you know, Mark McGarth! OF SUGAR RAY FAME. jfc this movie's reference game is absolute shit)
    - A blooper real at the end of shit that isn't funny(really puts into perspective just how sad all of this really is)

    There's probably more but I really don't fucking care; I'm fucking done. Now if you excuse me I'm going to contemplate what is life worth living for.
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