Before I go one to what is essentially a child's rant there is something I have to say first. I get you Neil Blomkamp, I really do. You're a white guy who grew up in Johannesburg and you feel really bad about it; I got that quite clearly from "District 9". So you can move on now. For all that is holy please move the fuck on, because so help me God. If Alien 5 is nothing more than some stupid shit about Xenomorph apartheid I'm going to find where you live and burn your fucking house down - or you know, just go into the fetal position and cry.

Alright then, on to that childish rant. One of the main problems I have with Chappie can be summed up into two words, "Die Antwoord". I mean I don't mind their music but for fuck sakes how much creative control did you give them? Because It feels like a whole damn lot. Their fucking plastered all over this movie. They not only play bigger roles then they should their music - like 2-3 songs repeated - makes up most of the damn soundtrack; Hans Zimmer gets the music credit and that feels like a damn lie. Not only that there are literal scenes where Ninja - also their character names are the same as the ones they use in the band - wears fucking band shirts that say Die Antwoord on the back and have his - or Yolandi - face on the front. Do you have any, ANY, idea how fucking stupid this is? Any at all Blomkamp? This is a fictional depiction of Johannesburg where you have something factual exist where it cannot possibly exist because you didn't establish that Die Antwoord is a thing in this reality you've created - or maybe Ninja & Yolandi are making music as they're slumming it up as criminals, I really don't fucking know. This is like Armageddon x100 - you know, when Ben Afflect & Liv Tyler make out while Steve Tyler - in the background - is singing I Don't Want to Miss a Thing as - I like to imagine - he watches his daughter make out. How you do not see this as a problem boggles my mind to no end. But they're South African so you're okay with it - I mean that's the only logical reasoning I can come up with as to why you'd allow such a thing. And to top off this shit cake, they cant act for shit; no surprise at all.

None of this helps the fact that Chappie just doesn't work well in the slightest. It's like Elysium all over again but much worse. Chappie is a film that has plenty of potential pissed in the wind. It has a wonderful concept that Blomkamp falls flat on his face trying to execute. Which is a shame because he gets one hell of a good performance from Sharlto Copley. He's fantastic as Chappie, it's a shame that for co-stars he has fucking Die Antwoord; seriously I'd rather have Danny Trejo & Peter Stormare as his co-stars, at least they can act. And outside of Copley most of the competent cast are regulated to bland roles. Hugh Jackman is thrown in to the "antagonist" role & and isn't given much at all to do with it other then being a complete twat. Sigourney Weaver is non-existent - I guess its better then making her a complete fool like Blomkamp did with Jodie Foster in Elysium. But the thing that pisses me off the most is the end; and not because it's entierly bad. Really, I'd say it's the most inventive part of the entire film; so much so that it would make for a great concept - if it hasn't already - for an entirely whole different film. And how does Blomkamp use it? Well he spends about 5-10min on it, using it as a cheep get out - regulated to nothing more then a stupid plot device.

After Chappie I feel it is safe for me to say that I'm done with Blomkamp's shit. Alien 5 is going to have to achieve a whole lot, because my patience has worn thin with this man. But to give credit where credit is do, Chappie isn't graffiti hell like Blomkamp's others have been. Glad to see he's working on what is most important. (3/10)